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Since January 2004




- ::: mE ::: -
| Irwandy aka ND |
| 27 |
| Kuala Lumpur |
| Working in Shah Alam |
| Photography, Blogging, Guitars |
| Music, Theatre, Movies, Cars |

| YM! : silverbullet_gt |


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ND's Latest News :-

- photography freak
- working in UMW, Shah Alam
- busy with working life lately


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Plain White Tee's - Hey There Delilah



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Siri Sampai Menutup Mata

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Siri Mencari Sinar

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Entri Yang Terhangat Di Pasaran

Aku Bukan Memilih
Pakaian Ketat : 18SX
Menjalinkan Hubungan
Why Call?
Ada Apa Dengan Perempuan?
Duit Hantaran
Melayu Kita
Mamak!!!
For The Love or Money
Mencarut?
Hantu
Kisah Di Traffic Light


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Tuesday, August 31, 2004
SELAMAT HARI MERDEKA!!!

Tuesday, 31st August 2004

SELAMAT HARI MERDEKA!!!
MERDEKA!!!
MERDEKA!!!
MERDEKA!!!

Merdeka?...Bagaimana kita hendak menghayati erti kemerdekaan? Adakah dengan hanya mengibarkan bendera jalur gemilang? Adakah dengan hanya melaungkan perkataan "MERDEKA" sekuat hati? Adakah dengan menghadiri konsert-konsert yg dianjurkan oleh pihak-pihak yg tertentu pada malam kemerdekaan?

Bagi aku, erti kemerdekaan tidak dapat dilafazkan dengan mulut dan tidak dapat ditulis dengan tangan. Ianya merupakan suatu perasaan & keadaan yang amat tinggi nilainya untuk setiap manusia. Sememangnya, kita amat bersyukur dan berterima kasih kepada para pemimpin & para pejuang yg menuntut kemerdekaan untuk negara kita suatu masa dahulu. Tanpa mereka, siapalah kita pada masa ini.

Actually, aku tgh pening...takde idea nak bercerita lebih lanjut tentang merdeka ni. Anyway, siang tadi bloggers gi Maju Junction...main Archery...I guess today is my lucky day...Hari ni aku jadi Robin Hood...hahahah...sorry eh Nuar..aku amik title ko la...hehe...5 round aku main...mmg puas hati...rasa nak main lagi tapi keadaan tak mengizinkan...gambar ade...tapi fotopages still buat hal...tak dpt nak upload...tunggu je la nanti ye...

Di sini, aku nak mengucapkan Selamat Hari Merdeka kepada semua pembaca blog ini serta kawan-kawan yg mengenali aku selama ini. Tanpa anda semua, siapalah aku. Akhir kata, walaupun perjuangan untuk menuntut kemerdekaan telah lama berjaya tetapi perjuangan untuk mengekalkan kemerdekaan negara kita tiada penghujungnya. Sama-samalah kita berjuang... ;) ...


Posted at 11:33 pm by irwandy
(1) Comments  

Monday, August 30, 2004
Merdeka Plan

Monday, 30th August 2004

Tadi gi tgk movie dgn Yanti, Lin, Dale & Kurekure...citer 13 Going On 30...lawak plak citer tu..eheh...pastu balik umah...rehat jap...kul 9pm kuar balik...jumpa Nuar, Langsatz, Purbe, MatJan, Kak Zaza, Kurekure & Lin...pastu kitorang gerak ke Putrajaya...nak celebrate Merdeka kat sana...kitorang konvoi 3 kete...

Dah sampai sana tu...jem plak...kitorang berpecah..mencarik parking...si kurekure & Lin amik Eisya & Iena kat area Masjid Putrajaya...pastu diorang jalan kaki ke Dataran Putrajaya...yg lain mmg dah park kat area Dataran tu...kitorang lepak2 la kat situ...tgk konsert yg hampeh...artis yg hampeh sebenarnya...Amy Search tu ok la...Rohana Jalil, Dato M Daud Kilau, OAG...yg lain aku tak kenal...haha...amik gambar...tgk karenah orang2 kat sana...macam-macam btol...huhu

Tepat kul 12am, 31 Ogos 2004...MERDEKA!!!...menjerit2, nyanyi ramai2 semua..huahua...kurekure plak happy gile...maklum la baru celebrate merdeka kat negara sendiri setelah 4 tahun sambut merdeka kat bekas negara penjajah...hehe...pastu kitorang pun gi kat kete memasing...

Nuar tak tahan nak kencing...nasib baik aku melanggar peraturan jalan kat situ sbb nak cepat...kete lain pun byk buat camtu...jem gile nak keluar dr parking...hahaha...sib baik sempat sampai kat foodcourt Presint 8 utk gi toilet....fuhhh...aku dpt melihat kelegaan di muka Nuar...muahahahaha...pastu tunggu E1 jap...then kitorang konvoi gi Serdang Utama...makan kat situ ramai2 dgn bebudak tadi...

Lepas habis merepek meraban...kitorang pun balik...aku hantar Langsatz, Lin & Nuar...pastu terus ke rumah tercinta...mengantuk gileeeeeeeeeeee...gambar aku nak upload, tapi fotopages buat hal plak...tunggu je la eh...huhu

SELAMAT HARI MERDEKA!

Posted at 11:33 pm by irwandy
(2) Comments  

Sunday, August 29, 2004
Kenduri Kahwin & Plan Malam Merdeka

Sunday, 29th August 2004

Around 10.50am pagi tadi, kurekuresakti aka rudy amik aku kat umah...pastu gi rumah yan...kitorang tunggu yan kat depan umah dia...pastu dia suh masuk...rupanya dale dah ade...ekin pun ade sbb dia tido umah yan...pastu lin dtg...borak-borak kat umah yan sambil plan camne nak gi sana...kul 12.30pm, kitorang pun gerak nak gi umah Mely kat Klang...berkonvoi dua kete...kete dale & kete kurekure...pastu lenz call, mintak tunggu kat plaza tol kemuning...dah sampai sana, kitorang gerak sesama...konvoi 3 kete...

Dah nak dekat sampai rumah mely, kete dale & kete lenz masuk simpang yg aku dgn kurekure tak masuk sbb aku sangka tu simpang yg salah!...rupanya kitorang yg salah...hahahah...pastu cover cakap nak gi amik E-1 kat Pelabuhan Utara...hahaha...mmg btol pun kitorang nak amik E-1... :D ...dah amik E-1, Walid & Tajul...kitorang terus gi umah Mely...abg dia kawin...kitorang ni konvoi macam Mely plak yg nak kawin...hahahahahh...

Sampai sana, makan2...lepak2...borak2...buat lawak...kul 3pm gerak dari situ gi Hospital Universiti kat UM...melawat CikNana yg masuk wad semalam...kitorang konvoi 4 kete gi sana...dah sampai hospital tu...wad tu bleh masuk 2 org sekali masuk...kitorang main redah 10 org masuk sekali...haha...ciknana ni plak macam sihat je nampak...hihi..tapi dalam diri dia sape yg tau kan...huhu...dia ada virus dlm darah dia...kena tahan kat wad sampai esok kot...hopefully you'll be okay...semoga cepat sembuh!...

Lepas tu, dale nak balik..dia ade hal...E-1 & Tajul kena hantar Walid balik hotel...so, aku,kurekure,yan,lin & ekin yg meneruskan perjuangan berpoye2 secara tak rasmi...hehe...kitorang berlima dlm kete...gelak bagai nak rak...tak habis-habis aku kenakan ekin..hehe...sorry ekin!...saje je gurau2...nak buat semua org happy... :D ...kitorang berlima menuju ke Kampung Baru...nak makan kat Chop & Steak...lapar gile semua org...pastu Wira pun join kitorang...dia baru balik dari Rembau...lepak2...makan2...minum2...gelak2..buat lawak semua...kul 8pm gerak hantar Yan, Lin & Ekin balik umah Yan...aku dgn kurekure meneruskan perjuangan untuk merayau...hehe...

Dalam taktau mana nak pegi tu, aku call Langsatz nak tanye pasal esok about malam merdeka punya plan...setelah beberapa persetujuan dibuat, akhirnya kitorang memilih untuk berkumpul di

Projet Wangsa Maju, kul 9.00pm esok(30 Ogos 2004)!...(venue berkumpul mungkin akan ditukar jika majoriti memilih untuk berjumpa di tempat lain)...

pastu maybe gi Putrajaya kot...sape nak join, meh la join...ramai-ramai menyambut detik malam merdeka...sesapa yg ade no phone aku, call/sms aku orait?...Barisan bloggers yg berkemungkinan besar akan pegi ialah aku, Langsatz, kurekure, E-1, Walid, Tajul, Tipah, Madulebah, Purbe, MatJan, Nuar...dan lain-lain tu tak confirm lagi kot...call je la aku esok..takut kitorang tukar venue ke ape ke...orait?...Jangan main pegi je tak kasitau kitorang...kang kitorang takde, jgn salahkan kitorang plaks...eheh...ni warning nih!... :D
 

Posted at 11:33 pm by irwandy
Comments Please  

Saturday, August 28, 2004
David Letterman Jokes

Saturday, 28th August 2004

1. Why do women wear red lipstick?
      To warn people it's the wrong hole!

2. What's the similarity between a woman's legs and bread&butter?
      Delicious when spread!

3. What's the difference between a bowling ball & a pussy? 
      You can only put in 3 fingers in a bowling ball.

4. Sex is like MATH:-
      ADD the bed, SUBTRACT the clothes, DIVIDE the legs, and MULTIPLY!

5. What do u get when u cross breed a rooster with an M&M?
      A cock that melts in your mouth not in your hands.

6. Why are Santa Clause's balls so big?
      Coz he only comes once a year! Ho! Ho! HO!

7. Dodi saw his driver in heaven and said:
      I said I wanna fuck Di in the tunnel, not fucking die in the tunnel!

8. Why do men get paid more at the sperm bank than in a blood bank?
      Sperm is handmade.

9. What happen to Egyptian girls who forget to take their pills?
      They become mummies!

10. What part of the human anatomy that ocassionally drips & feels good when blown?
      The NOSE!

11. What are the 2 best parts of a wedding?
      Playing of the organ & Coming of the bride.


"Emma come first. Den I come. Den two asses come together. I come once-a-more. Two asses, they come together again. I come again and pee twice. Then I come one lasta time." - Italian guy spells MISSISSIPPI

Posted at 11:33 pm by irwandy
Comments Please  

Friday, August 27, 2004
Dear Lai Ma...

Friday, 27th August 2004

The recent hoo-ha over a couple having sex inside a Kancil has spilled over to the 5Star. Many readers have written in to asked for our expert advice.

Our 5Star columnist, Ms Lai Ma(formerly a karaoke lounge singer), is more of a 'Mercedes type' rather than a 'Kancil type'. Nevertheless, she will try to answer your questions as best as she can.  And we wish to remind you that the5Star is 5 times better than that lousy dipshit one-Star competitor.


Dear Lai Ma
Every time I and my girlfriend make out in a Kancil, the car will start rocking up and down. This motion attracts the attention of passing cops who then come and park their motorcycle in front of the car. Is there a way to prevent the Kancil from rocking up and down? I have already changed the absorbers, tyres and even the cushion covers, but nothing works. I hope you don't mind my asking you this very technical question.
Nuclear Scientist

Dear Nuclear Scientist
This is a very technical problem and needs very specialized knowledge to solve. I know that my  departmental office boy makes out with his girlfriend in a Kancil in the car park at night. He uses a car jack to first jack up the side of the car a bit. When the weight of the car rests on four wheels and one jack, it will not rock very much. Don't be afraid to ask us technical questions. We, at the 5Star, are all very technical people.

Dear Lai Ma
I have made out with guys in both Mercedes and Kancils. I find that I am able to achieve better  orgasms inside a Kancil. Does that mean that Kancil drivers are better lovers than Mercedes drivers?
Beh Pai Seh

Dear Beh Pai Seh
Kancil drivers are not better lovers. The reason why you have been getting better orgasms in a Kancil is because the car is very cramped inside, which gave you a much tighter feeling. The tighter the better mah......

Dear Lai Ma
My boyfriend just bought a new Kancil and I find that there is not enough space in the back seat for  proper lovemaking. My legs would stick out of the left window and his legs stick out of the right  window. Do you think we should modify the car?
Miss Contort

Dear Miss Contort
Your legs.....left window....his legs......right window. Oh...I understand now! Please do not, I repeat, do not attempt the "sixty-nine" position inside any car. Get a hotel room instead.

Dear Lai Ma
We read so much about people having sex in a Kancil. My girlfriend and I decided to try it. So  yesterday she went down on me in the front seat. But I find that the Kancil is really cramped, and her head keeps blocking me from reaching the gear shift. Is this normal?
First Timer

Dear First Timer
You want to reach the gear shift, for what? Oh....my....gawd......!!! You are awesome !!!But I think that in future, before you and your girlfriend try oral sex, you should stop the car first.

Dear Lai Ma
I hear everybody talking about having sex with kancil nowadays, like it is the hottest thing to do. I  orso want. So I go to the jungle to see if I can catch a female kancil. But I catch nothing. Because  I think everybody caught all the kancil already. Never leave some for me. Why like dat? Why the world so fu(ked up?
Chin Tu Lan

Dear Tu Lan
You are a pervert. Also retarded. Very. People have sex in Kancil, not with kancil. You understand  the difference or not, idiot? Ni Na Beh. I don't want to answer this type of sick questions any more. And how many times must I tell you not to write to me? But my talkcock editor said that we are a 5 star paper and we should not discriminate against perverts. He said that dirty perverts need love too. What a moron. But okay, if you want to make love to Kancil, go right ahead. Just stick your dick into the exhaust pipe, and have fun. And tell me which Kancil you are using. Because I want to come and start the engine.

Posted at 11:33 pm by irwandy
(1) Comments  

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